Entries by David Puder
A letter to new fathers… on connecting with your lovie
“Sir you cannot sit there! We have to clear this aisle… Are those all your books?” “Hmm… No…” I looked down, feeling a bit of shame, but it quickly turned to anger… Seriously, this is why people just shop on Amazon! Because of stupid rules like this! Here I am, just allowing my one year […]
About
Welcome to my blog! I am Dr. David Puder a psychiatrist based out of Redlands California. I blog to share my curiosity and passion on how we can improve our connections with others. I dream that we might embrace the challenge of pursuing more meaningful connections as the primary goal. Connection was not something that always came naturally to […]
Why DARE failed… and it keeps going…
16 years ago a paper came out as a 10 year follow up to the DARE (Drug Alcohol Resistance Education) program showing that it had no effect in changing anything. (Lynam, 1999) The abstract reads: “The present study examined the impact of Project DARE (Drug Abuse Resistance Education), a widespread drug-prevention program, 10 years after administration. […]
Mirror Neurons: what they teach us about connection…
When watching your favorite sport do you feel like you are apart of it? When watching someone cry do you feel their sadness? When seeing someone in pain, do you also feel that pain to some extent? When you see someone move, does it make you want to move as well? The basic idea: when […]
How to notice and use micromicroexpression to connect
The art of connection begins with deeply listening to people. I learned from my mentor Dr. Tarr that connection comes from right-brain to right-brain emotional relating to one another. Some people naturally can tune into another person’s emotions with extreme accuracy and be incredibly empathic. Others of us need to improve our ability to understand […]
The Video That Changed My Life (The Still Face Experiment)
I have watched this video at least 100 times. Told my friends about it. Lectured about it. It changed my life, by showing me what is connection and disconnection. Perhaps it is why I am so fascinated by connection. When you see it, and really soak it in, think about all its implications, it changes […]
Connecting In A New World Of Dating.
I am no longer on the market, but I have some friends and patients that I talk to about dating. There are three mistakes that people make in dating: 1. Not meeting the right people. 2. Not setting up a low intensity first date. 3. Feeling a deep commitment early on with someone you […]
3 Life Lessons on Connection I learned From My Mentor Dr. John Tarr
I was taught by Dr. John Tarr as a resident physician and now co-teach with Dr. Tarr on Thursdays. We teach psychotherapy classes and review video with residents on their therapy sessions. Dr. John Tarr’s passionate portrayal of the inner workings of the mind have inspired me and informed many of my ideas on how […]
6 Ways To Move Out Of Disconnection.
I am speaking in this post to people who at times feel disconnected, out of body, dizzy, light headed, and un-grounded. These times can come around times of stress, trauma triggers, or sometimes people feel this perpetually for a season. I think if we tune into someone’s story, if they feel this, then we will also […]